Saturday 1 June 2013

The Most Beautiful Serbian Women

Najlepše Srpkinje 


(samo javne ličnosti, razume se, inače bi konkurencija bila neuporedivo oštrija)


Više mi je dojadilo da gledam inferiorne liste sa ružnim, muškobanjastim, nosatim, izoperisanim rugobama koje srpski mediji i nekolicina idiJota s neta promovišu kao neke bajne lepotice, a i preko kurca mi je više da gledam te polu-pismene akrepe kako se trte po raznim seljoberskim TV kanalima i primitivnim časopisima, izigravajući dame i princeze. Blago ćoravima i neizbirljivima.

Pa zato pomislih da je već stvarno krajnje vreme da neko s ukusom (tj. npr. moja malenkost) napokon izbaci listu sa srpkinjama koje ne izgledaju kao da su im konji ižvakali njuške. Da, na ovoj listi su isključivo prave lepotice, ženstvene žene sa estrogenom, a to naravno znači nikakva Jelena Kurleuša, Serka Aleksić, Olja Grdnogorac i ostale trandžo-prostakuše kojima praziluk viri iz silikoniziranih kravljih bulja. Pičkojevac im je tetoviran na čelima, a slonovske njonje ne mogu da im smanje ni najbolji svetski plastični hirurzi. Znači, gubi vreme svako ko ovde traži maljave, nabildovane turbo-folkerke i slične profuknjače-degeneruše grubih/oštrih crta lica.

Srbija spada u sâm svetski vrh sto se ženske lepote tiče, te je zbog toga stostruka sramota reklamirati kockaste, koščate, ištipane, kafanske prakljače kao simbol lepote tj. predstavnice Balkana. Neki muškarci sa ovih prostora ocenjuju/gledaju žene kao da su tek izašli iz ćuze posle 35 godina teške robije - pa im zbog toga praktično svako dvonožno bice sa vaginom dodje kao lepotica. Stid da vas bude; 'ajde se malo opasuljite, i ostavite te latentno-homoseksualne fazone. Ako preferirate muškurce onda to i priznajte (sebi) a ne da očajnički trazite žene koje će da ispune sve vaše ideale muške lepote. Ova lista se bavi ženskom lepotom i ničim drugim.

I naravno da se na listi nalaze i nekadašnje lepotice, a ne samo aktuelne. Lepota je prolazna, medjutim ova lista nije. Takodje ne nameravam da cepidlačim i da se prepirem s vama da li je neka žena zaista srpkinja ili eventualno hrvatica, polu-bosanka, cetvrt-makedonka ili sta već; meni je to sve isto.

Kriterijum odabira se bazira isključivo na facama, prema tome veličina sisa i slično ne igra nikakvu ulogu - mada tu-i-tamo načnem tu temu u opisima. Opsirne liste vezane za grudi su postavljene na ovom blogu i internacionalnog tipa su. Nisam ubacivao preterano mnogo stereotipicnih model/miss lepotica kakvih ima brdo, jer smatram da vrhunske lepotice moraju da imaju nesto posebno i neobicno na faci. Barbike me generalno ne zanimaju i ne smatram ih dovoljno lepim za ovu listu.

Takodje, treba upamtiti da ovo nije lista lepih srpkinja već najlepših, tako da se ne čudite ako fale žene koje su lepe ali ne i fantastične. Naravno, neki od vas će pobrkati te koje fale sa onim muškobanjastim rugobama koje ja ne bih stavio ni na listu najlepših 100,000 srpkinja, a kamoli pedesetak.




46. Svetlana Bojković
actress

The reason I didn't place her further up the list (i.e. down) is that she's had large fluctuations looks-wise. When she first started off she wasn't that pretty, but then she turned into this (see photo) and without plastic surgery, but then sank again, after which she entered a phase when she looked good again, etc. Up and down. In that sense, she's a unique case. I don't know if that had anything to do with her heavy alcohol binging.


45. Ivana Pavlović
pop singer
Nice hair.



44. Rialda Kadrić
actress


43. Danina Jeftić
actress


42. Ivana Sel(j)akov
turbo-folk "singer"
One of only two turbo-folk floozies on the list. Just goes to show that I don't discriminate against illiterate mob-connected slags who "sing" neo-Turkish pop-"folk" shit, but focus on looks as the only criteria. It just so happens that turbo-folk attracts the more primitive, transgender females with large craniums and masculine jaw-lines, so it's not my fault that Ivana is a rare specimen here, a true beauty in spite of the shit lifestyle she'd chosen.



41. Lolita Davidovich
U.S. actress
What's she doing here, you might ask. Well, her father is a Serb, she was born in Belgrade, and she even speaks the language, so obviously she qualifies for the list. If her face were just a tiny little bit less wide she'd be in the top 5, methinks.


40. Zdravka Krstulović
actress





39. Biljana Šešević
tennis wife, TV presenter
Married to top-10 player Janko Tipsarevic. She is possibly the best-looking tennis wife/girlfriend (that I know of) currently. Looks even better when she smiles. Still, the best all-time tennis wife/groupie/girlfriend is Goran Ivanisevic's Croat ex from the 90s, whassername.


38. Ivona Pantelić
anchorwoman
There she is, anchoring away. The hair is shit, but the face very cute.


37. Ružica Veljković
reality-TV starlet, media buffoon, high-end prostitute

Who is her famous twin sister? Find out here.

http://vjetropev.blogspot.com/2013/06/these-people-look-alike-3.html


36. Draga Dzinić
casting show constestant, soprano


35. Danijela Stajnfeld
actress



34. Goca Tržan
pop singer
Awful deep voice, even worse songs. Terrific tits though.


33. Aleksandra Bursać
turbo-folk "singer"
You see this face, and you think "wow". But then... you hear her "sing" and yowl, and immediately you wanna run away. One of thousands of dumb young girlies striving for a career in the shittiest type of music on the entire planet: many Serbs think it's folk music, but it's essentially a heavily bastardized version of folk, 98% of it being influenced by modern Turkish pop-folk. This stupid little bitch sings it every day, hence she's a fucking moron. But this isn't an IQ list.


32. Jelena Gavrilović
actress




31. Gordana Draganić
reality-TV, model

She's got the whole package, great tits included.



30. Sara Trajanović
Model, reality-TV star.



29. Merima Isaković
actress




28. Ljiljana Lašić
actress, playwright



27. Ana Djokić
violinist (ex-Orthodox Celts)
I have no idea why she never appears on people's "prettiest Serb women" lists. I guess she isn't thin enough, ugly enough, or plastic enough.
Passed by her once, looks even better in flesh.

 
26. Nadja Higl
pro swimmer
What can I say? I love freckled gingers. Her voice is a problem; quite deep, perhaps as a result of doping which nearly all professional swimmers do. I hope I'm wrong. I doubt she's a Serb at all; the name is German-sounding, she's red all over, and I believe she has a Hungarian background. But hey, it's my list, my rules. I can include whomever I want.


25. Nataša Mićić
politician
I know I'll get a lot of flack for including her, but most of her detractors are anyway Commie bastards and Far Right retards; hypocrites who'd probably drop everything in a second to spend just a minute with her. Intelligent, charismatic, and what's very rare for a Balkan politician - normal.



24. Jelena Tinska
dancer, TV personality, columnist, whatever the hell else
A very confused woman that likes to talk crap on chat shows. She can literally jabber for hours without even gasping for a breath of air, yet nothing but shit comes out. Posed nude decades ago, but now complains about the fall of morals; what a hypocrite.
Her actress daughter Zelda isn't bad-looking but not good enough for this list.



23. Aleksandra Obradović-Gudelj
TV presenter, model
One of few stereotypical beauties on this list, but this one has that extra something.


22. Divna Ljubojević
singer of traditional music
She is the antithesis of the sort of peasant-looking transvestite trollops that inhabit most "best Serbian women" lists. You can tell just by looking at her that she's a real lady, cultured and well-mannered, i.e. not some cock-sucking whore who fucks her way to the top (you 31,483 pop/rock/turbo-folk bitches know who you are).



21. Danijela Karić
pop singer
Part of a large, mega-wealthy, influential (in the 90s at least) Karic clan, who are sort of musicians/politicians/mobsters. That such a bunch of ugly, semi-literate peasants could produce such a lovely-looking woman is a bit of a mystery. 
The Karic clan was politically close to the Milosevic regime and now sucks up to Putin. They reside in Russia. As I said, criminals.



20. Jelena Djokić
actress
Another freckled beauty, and she's got them all over her body.
Not to be confused with either Jelena Dokic (a good-looking Serbian-Aussie tennis pro) or the slut-wise Jelena Djokic who fucked a guy in a reality-TV show.



19. Stana Katić
actress

From the popular TV series "Castle". A Canadian actress but both her parents are Serbs.


18. Sanda Rašković-Ivić
politician
 This is her middle-aged, so you can imagine what she looked like at 20.
I guess I will never understand how such a lovely, intelligent woman can be a Far Right Nationalist loon and perpetual bullshitter. Only crap comes out of her perfectly shaped mouth, which is quite a shocking contrast: you wanna strangle her and kiss her at the same time. But who knows what mental damage lurks behind the calm, smiling, pleasant-looking exterior. Perhaps she was molested by an uncle as a kid and now feels the need to make the people of Serbia pay for it. Sanda, it's not our fault: you should have whacked him with a vase.



17. Iva Milošević
theater director (believe it or not)
I don't know anything about her. It's quite telling though that some barely known Serbian theater director looks a hundred times better than most of Hollywood's current A-list females. Jennifer Aniston, Drew Barrymore, Cameron Diaz, Kristen Stewart, Jennifer Garner or Julia Roberts: all faces I wouldn't give to a pig.


 
16. Ana Ivanović
tennis pro, former no.1
A very sweet girl, in spite of the fact that she is attracted to and went out with a mentally weak Spanish poseur such as Fernando Verdasco and then later with a German footballer named after a pig. Body-wise far too tall (185 cm - as tall as me) and slightly big-boned. Adopted an anorexic look recently, which of course looks pretty bad. Thanks to her and Sharapova, we actually got to see a Grand Slam finale (2008) that wasn't made up of any testosterone-gulping WTA monsters.

 
15. Stanislava Pešić
actress
Don't know much about her, apart from the fact that she's dead and that her sister is a prominent politician. In Serbia, connections and nepotism are all the rage: if one family member makes it, they pull everybody with them, talented/qualified or not. Her sister happens to be OK, actually.

 
14. Nataša Zorić
tennis pro
I admit that I'm partial to pony-tailed women who swing a racket around really well, but you have to admit that she deserves to be on this very exclusive list.


13. Nataša Šolak-Tapušković
actress
She has that fresh natural beauty which stereotypical Barbie types lack.


12. Zlata Petković
actress
Another dead actress, and another one I don't know shit about. I do remember watching her as a kid (when I was a kid, not watching her being a kid). Not to be confused with the ugly turbo-folk whore Zlata Petrovic.


 11. Irena Šućur
model
Looks far better when not posing for these idiotic fashion magazines. A bit too tall, of course, but I think the boobs are natural, and the face is pretty much perfect. A stereotypical beauty perhaps, but very much my taste.


10. Daliborka Stojšić
Miss Yugoslavia, singer
I didn't expect I'd find a miss anything worthy of this list, considering they're usually quite average, but there you go. I love the way women had their hair in the 60s.


9. Sanja Vejnović
actress

She's aged amazingly, this is Sanja in her 40s. Plays a role in an annoying, much-hyped piece-of-shit soaper called "Larin Izbor" (Lara's Fucking Choice), but she's forgiven.
This is supposed to be a Serbian list and she's a Croat, some of you morons might moan. Well, there seems to be some speculation as to her heritage i.e. she could have some Serbian ancestors - and that's all the green light that I need to put this stunner on the list. Besides, aren't Croats merely catholicized Serbs?

I've not included any "purely" Croat women, despite that fact.



8. Zorica Lazić
TV-reality star
This poor thing was killed in a car-crash before the 2nd season of Big Brother was even finished, along with two other participants. A gorgeous woman, intelligent and likable as well, what a damn shame.



7. Borka Tomović
actress
I have no idea how this beauty managed to stay unnoticed by me so long i.e. until I started doing this list. 

 
6. Ivana Stamenković "Sindi"
pop singer, model
She has the sexiest voice and accent imaginable, which I'm sure annoys a whole bunch of women. Listening to it, her already high sex-appeal triples. Possibly the best body on this list, too. Real boobs, amazing legs, not too tall not too short, neither chubby nor anorexic, i.e. just perfect. She also has a fairly unusual face, which is a bonus: unique beauty always beats classic beauty (e.g. Irena Sucur above). Her younger sister, who looks quite average (an ex-pop-siren), is a Nationalist freak and is actually warming a seat in the Serbian Parliament. (That's Serbian politics for ya.) Ivana was assaulted by another model in Celebrity Big Brother 5, which was one of the highlights of that season. I passed her by once, and she looks just as amazing in the flesh.
I love her Indian look, so cute. Watch her hold the mike while she adjusts her boobs; if that isn't sexy I don't know what is.

 
5. Ivana Maksimović
Olympic medalist in shooting
Can you believe this mega-cute little girl actually shoots guns for a living? I am just as surprised as you are that I've got so many athletes on this list. (OK, so shooting is not a real sport, it's bullshit, but who cares.) If all female shooters looked like this I'd become a fan quicker than she could fire a bullet at me.

 
4. Milena Dravić
actress
I sort of see her as the Balkan Goldie Hawn, during her very young phase (no, not when she was 5), only (much) better-looking of course.
Charismatic, likable, funny, with a cute voice, considered the actress of Yugoslavian cinema. Very unusual looks, not comparable to anyone (aside from Goldie Hawn of course, but even that is iffy).

Here's some comments (in Serbian) of her many roles, and other YU movies:
http://www.imdb.com/list/ls073264373/


3. Marija Petronijević
actress
The only useful thing that Nazi-Commie retard Emir Kusturica ever did in his pathetic, charlatan life was to break this gorgeous girl into movies. If she'd been born into a powerful Hollywood family (as opposed to a little village in Serbia), by now she'd be a bigger star than that dumb overrated skinny slut Angelina Jolie.
Here we see her getting evicted from a retarded reality TV show called "Farma". I don't know whether she was given the boot due to vote-manipulation perpetrated by the show's corrupt producers, or whether Serbian women (who basically make up the bulk of the votes for these shows) are that dumb and that jealous of beautiful women. Let's hope she didn't sign up for "The Farm" because her career is that much in the dumps; God knows Serbian TV and cinema - overrun by shit-looking nepotists - need beauties and badly.

 
2. Marijana Mićić
Big Brother presenter/host, actress
Just look at that face. She's a perfect 10. A very close second.
Fairly bright for a TV host/actress, and not without a sense of humour which only adds to the overall effect. The only criticism would be her voice which isn't deep (a big problem in the Balkans) but a little too shrill.

 
1. Danijela Vranješ
actress
I actually met her once, in 2012, under pretty weird circumstances. She was in front of Sava Centar, waiting for a guy - and because she didn't know what he looked like she thought it might be me! So she kept starring at me, and I starred back. Afterwards I said hi and explained that I wasn't him (lucky fucking bastard, whoever he may be!). But don't think she tops the list coz I met her; she was my no.1 long before that.
She is 40 now, but can easily pass off as 30.
Her worst career move was to agree to star in Dorcol-Menhetn, a terrible piece of crap written-directed by a pseudo-intellectual bird-face with delusions of genius (she's on my ugly list). Danijela knows it was a mistake, and has hopefully learned something from it.
The only complaint I have is her tendency to sometimes go for the overly skinny look. (I don't mean this photo.)
Would anyone actually not agree that she doesn't deserve first place?




For my Ugliest Serbian Women list, go to: 


23.1.2017.